Cotton Blog

t-shirts, fashion, stuff...

Archive for June 2010

FizzyT, June 30th, 2010

World Cup blah blah! Budget blah! Glastonbury Blah blah blah! But what’s this? Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas wearing her underwear as outerwear? That’s interesting! Oh, I know Madonna’s been doing it for years, Lady Gaga does nothing else, and Kylie started doing it when she decided it was how to sell dire music. But this is new to me. Fergie is wearing a kind of primitive bosom hoiker ON TOP of her clothes; a Marlon Brando t-shirt, if you’re interested. What could this mean? Do you think she forgot her undies at the last minute and just grabbed the nearest husky harness? Is it one of those zappy things that naughty dogs wear? Or, is it the lastest fashion that she has tapped into because she is a Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas and must be one step ahead? Will we all be wearing them in 6 months? Are they just for girls, or is there a moob version to promote a healthy uplift? So many, many questions, I’m all of a dither!

FizzyT, June 29th, 2010

Looney Rooney!

Looney Rooney!

Oh double dear. That World Cup thingey didn’t go very well, did it? I don’t think we ever really got going and already the team are homeward bound along with a lot of fans who paid a small fortune to go to South Africa* weeping into their vuvuzelas sobbing “we were robbed, it was a goal”

It turns out, however that there is a more valid reason than simply being overpaid and rubbish; the England squads’ lucky pants were stolen by evil pant thieves. Of course, that explains it then. No one can play World Cup matches and win without their lucky pants. Well, except the Germans, obviously.

The tragedy for the lads and also for 6 million a year Fabio Capello is that it is impossible to have much sympathy with people who are paid so much at a time when huge budget cuts mean everyone else has to watch every penny.

Oh well, at least there is amusement in the rather hilarious virals that are doing the rounds. Luckily the boss has dragged himself out of his football depression to produce this wonderful t-shirt.

* about what an England player earns in a minute!!

FizzyT, June 28th, 2010

Judging by all the pictures in the papers over the weekend, you could be forgiven for thinking that only the rich, famous and Pixie Geldof attended Glastonbury. The masses who actually went to enjoy the music and get terrible sunburn have been largely ignored in the quest to get close ups of what the stars are wearing, shielded from the general public in their VIP enclosure, and encased from top to toe in designer grunge and sleeping in luxury teepees, and really not slumming it at all.  Although, like a societal set of Russian Dolls, whilst the VIP enclosure maybe for the common or garden slebs, there will be enclosure upon enclosure as the slebs go from Z to A list in the Very Important VIP areas, where only the truly privileged and well connected may enter. This applies to Kates Hudson and Moss, and not to any BB contestants. Ever.

So it is nice to see the odd snap of the mere mortals who frequent the festival, sporting their music t-shirts in an unironed and ironic way.  This man wearing a Lady Gaga t-shirt is nicely covered up with a sensible hat.

It’s time for one and all to dig out those old rock n’ roll t-shirts and have a mini festival experience. Whilst hastily stuffing all those England World Cup t-shirts to the back of the drawer. A-hem!

FizzyT, June 27th, 2010

Whilst the idea of the ideal female form has fluctuated throughout time, the male body has endured less pressure to be perfect. Any man, if he hits the gym hard enough, can end up with perfect pecs, a 6 pack and a shape a bit like Arnie.

But sadly it seems, this is no longer enough. The demands for the male figure to conform to female ideals has seen a massive rise in the moob job and a staggering increase in the cases of anorexia in men. Somehow buff is no longer enough to get the ladies going. In fact, the beefed up images of Alex Reid seem to make girls in their dozens reach for the sick bag. No, geek chic has become an all over pursuit.

Think pale, tall, interesting and narrow, with cheekbones all over, like a catwalk model, or a beautiful Jarvis Cocker. Easy peasy. Simple to attain that, surely. I’m sure there’s still a rack in the Tower of London somewhere.

I read somewhere this week, that it is because of the pill that women are now going for more androgynous men, although I can’t for the life of me remember why. But think Russell Brand, rather than Russell Crowe. David Tennant not David Beckham, and you’re along the right lines. Even the mannequins are getting skinnier, cast as they are on the form of the Burberry model Davo, he of the 29 inch waist.

By these calculations, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty were the perfect couple. But compare them to Katie Price and Alex Reid, both exhibitors of the exaggerated male and female forms and you might start to see what I am getting at. Well, sort of. Neither couple are really what you might aspire to in the quest for perfection. Or hygiene really, in Pete’s case.

Still, help is at hand. All you need to do, is order your favourite t-shirt in one size bigger and it will appear as though you’ve lost those niggling pounds, and hang down as though you’ve been living on lettuce for weeks. See? There’s a solution to everything. In a way!

FizzyT, June 26th, 2010

Well, Glastonbury must be having the best weather ever, with this weekend being full of blazing sunshine. So much so, in fact that a large number of people are having to be treated for heatstroke. Still, enough of that. Glasto fashion is more exciting than Royal Ascot (hats again, yawn) This year, judging by the pap pics, essential festival wear is a t-shirt teemed with a pair of teeny little shorts, as sported by ever so squeaky clean looking Emma Watson, much grubbier Pixie Geldof and festival oldie Kate Moss. Oh, and Sienna Miller, who’s still trying to look as if the whole Boho thing was nothing to do with her, honest.

Big acts so far include the wonderful Shakira, she of the truthful hips, and Kylie, she er…..of Neighbours. What could be better than that!

FizzyT, June 25th, 2010

Ultra glamorous singer Beyonce hardly ever looks scruffed up with a hair out of place, so I was quite glad to see her going for the dressed down look for once. Here she is in half a t-shirt and another half of a pair of jeans, and looks totally fantastic. Her graphic print t-shirt is so now it’s almost then, and her lack of flab and beer belly is doing her the world of favours by not ruining the look, and making her seem as though she burst out of her clothes.

Yeehaw Vest!

Yeehaw Vest!

Personally, if you were going to emulate Beyonce’s rockin’ beach wear, I might suggest you try a longer t-shirt, like this one from All Saints, just so you can have your cake and eat it, and then have another slice or two, and noone will know. Or do some sit ups if you want to go the whole hog. Naah! Only joking!

FizzyT, June 24th, 2010

I almost didn’t want to say anything more about the World Cup since it looked as though we might be following the French back home in disgrace. However, something went right against Slovenia and we’re on for another game. Hooray! Against the Germans. Oh no, surely not the Germans!

The English and their old rivals are due to meet on Sunday, and the English boys are being allowed a little frolic with their patiently shopping, er waiting WAGS.

Now the boring matches are out of the way, and it’s sudden death, there’s also the possibility that more people will become interested in the second round, and so World Cup fashion rears it’s beautiful head once again.

There’s a definite amount of variety in the World Cup wear available to Women. Different garments with versions of the England flag lift football t-shirts out of the Sporty Spice league, and into something you might actually enjoy wearing. Whilst you could go for a red sparkly cross on the t-shirt of your choice, or an I Love England motif, or my old favourite the collage, the possibilities are endless if you want to create your own look.

This vest t-shirt from Next scores highly in terms of patriotism and style. The stripey top is very now, and the England logo is nice and shiny, making it a perfect all round summer item.

You could, of course, go one better, especially if you are supporting Germany, and do like their WAGS. Now that’s what I call dedicated!

FizzyT, June 23rd, 2010

Design Festival!

Design Festival!

Well, Glastonbury kicks off today, celebrating it’s 40th anniversary, and there doesn’t seem to be a smidgen of the infamous mud in sight. In fact, the weather looks pretty good, and likely to stay that way for the duration.

As well as welcoming literally squillions of performers, Glastonbury is also known for it’s charitable leanings. Major supporters of Oxfam, Greenpeace and WaterAid, it aims to draw attention to hard hitting issues to festival goers, in a variety of novel ways.

One idea that I love this year is Oxfam’s Design your own T-shirt. This is part of a scheme to support their Climate Change Campaign, whereby you buy their Fair Deal T-shirt Kit (from £4) and then customise it yourself, in whatever way you want. A lovely new twist to the charity t-shirt we know and love. And who knows, if the weather holds, it might even stay reasonably mud free!

FizzyT, June 22nd, 2010

The Dark Prince!

The Dark Prince!

Bloody George, he’s being called for his savage cuts and swipes. But The New Prince of Darkness (well, it will be dark when we can’t afford light bulbs any more, won’t it!) has finally delivered his Budget. Calling it his “Austerity Budget” he has cut back Welfare Payments and frozen Child Benefit. VAT will jump to 20% next year. But that’s ok, because he hasn’t increased duty on alcohol or cigarettes, so we can drown our sorrows still.

I’m not sure if I like George in his new guise as Chancellor, he has too much of the look of public executioner about him. Still, I like him on this wonderful t-shirt as Ozzy Osbourne. Oh that hair so suits him! It might even be a useful disguise for him as the austerity measures kick in, and we look for someone to blame!

FizzyT, June 21st, 2010

Who's a Clever Boy? No, Really, Who?

Who's a Clever Boy? No, Really, Who?

Tomorrow’s Budget is expected to be one of the harshest for 30 years. Everything fun is going to cost more. Actually, everthing is going to cost more. Eek!

If George Osborne wasn’t worth about 4 million, and his wife wasn’t having a jolly on the Murdoch’s yacht, I might feel an ounce of sympathy to him for having to be the bearer of such bad news. Sadly though, I feel it will not dent his savings all that much. In fact, what a lucky sausage to even have savings. Expect VAT to go up, petrol and other toxins essential to human life. Council Tax is going to be frozen, so still no road gritting if we have another harsh winter, and other such dastardly measures, aimed directly at those of us who aren’t bankers.

And to top it all off. They’re going to scrap the Budget Briefcase. How very mean is that? More to the point, do we have enough money to buy a new one? Savings, George, savings. I’m sure we can eek out a few more years out of that old thing. Anyway, if it’s only be used for one day a year for 150 years, then it’s had less than 6 months of real use. How’s that for a throwaway society?

Today then, an old favourite in terms of t-shirt slogans. The “I’m with Stupid” line has been around since the Romans had “I’m with stvpid” daubed on their togas. Rarely, though has it seemed so beautifully poignant. And utterly, utterly scary!